Enneagram Type 6 in A Relationship with Type 6
How Does Each Enneagram Type Enhance the Relationship?
As you may imagine, in all double-type relationships the qualities brought by both types are basically the same. The similarities between both types can be a source of attraction, as well as one of their main obstacles. That being the case, the health level of each type is particularly important. A couple made up of Sixes is generally strong as they deeply understand each other; and if they don’t, they will make the effort to understand why. When two Sixes meet, they will generally fall in love at first sight. They not only connect with each other deeply, but they also connect quickly as they can easily sense each other’s kindred spirit and mutual understanding.
A double Six couple will share secrets and values; they will question and intellectually stimulate each other like two little kids playing together on a summer afternoon. Trust is extremely valued by Sixes since it allows them to be themselves and find out how they really feel about different matters. Once the relationship is established, they can relax and enjoy themselves as a couple just like they enjoy being with friends. Loyalty and commitment are some of the aspects they naturally offer each other, along with mutual support and protection. They are also ready to help their partner without thinking twice.
Another of this couple’s common traits is the great deal of unspoken sensitivity between them since Sixes aren’t used to openly talking about their feelings. As a result, their feelings and emotions are mainly expressed through their actions, dedication, and inspiration, since they both work for their wellbeing and happiness.
Possible Conflicts and Differences of Opinion:
The main problem regarding double-Six pairs has to do with their intensity when it comes to facing conflicts. Sixes tend to be emotionally reactive, and once a spirit of negativity or irony appears, their fears can definitely take them down. As they are emotionally intense, they may act impulsively and have extreme reactions instead of thinking clearly or analyzing the possible consequences of their actions. They may arbitrarily take any course of action that promises to relieve their anxiety and find it difficult to look for a proper solution to their problems. This is how double-Six pairs may end up involved in the worst-case scenarios to the point that they both feel like chaos is surrounding them and they are doomed.
Also, double-Six couples can become indecisive and confused during conflicts, totally unable to act and to get some perspective on their problems. Since Sixes are reactive people, they tend to discuss and blame the other for the situation and for not providing a solution. Shifting blame back and forth can feel like a ping-pong match where the only goal is to hurt their opponent and find a way out of all of the anxieties until a solution appears.
In this way, this couple can be one of the most critical of all: lots of yelling, outbursts, arguments, and blaming in the mix. And once this dynamic is established, it gets really difficult to break the pattern as many of these couple’s fears are irrational and based on speculations about the future. Most of the time there is no way to settle them logically until the future takes place. Accusations of betrayal or lack of support can be part of the picture as they find it almost impossible to reestablish trust and the playful spirit they used to have.
