You Are Most Like type 8:
The Challenger
Enneagram type 8 is a natural leader. Will and power sparkle at your hands. You want to rule the world and stand out, and you do so because you’re the most outstanding type.
CORE DESIRE:
To be independent
CORE FEAR:
Being controlled or harmed
Enneagram 8: Overview
Ready to set your kingdom up, as a Type 8 you step up into life with strength. Self-assertive and always showing a half-smile, you want the world to know you are here. Eights are not scared at all. The world showed you how harsh and dangerous things can be, so now it’s your time to show the world how fearless and outstanding you are. Your fingers tickle for power. The Challenger will never settle for something small. You know you have the ability to rise higher and higher. If as a Type 8 you know how to play your cards correctly and learn to reign in your over-controlling obsessions, you’ll surely thrive and inspire others to be the stars they are. As an Eight, you just need to learn to pick your battles and connect.
What Motivates you?
Picture a Type 8 walking through long halls in slow motion while [insert soundtrack here] plays in the background. Enneagram Eights are the lions of the Enneagram. You love to be in charge, doing things your way as you think that’s the best for everyone. We appreciate that, 8s (shaking). Your life as an Enneagram 8 is based on protecting yourself from everything and everyone, but with an aggressive response. You don’t wait for the world to attack; you go first. As an Eight, you impact and establish what you want. Nothing more, nothing less…ok, maybe more is better.
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How do you think?
Being soft? That’s for marshmallows. As they see you, they treat you. That’s why as the Challenger you work really hard to build your powerful and respectable persona. You think the world is tough—and you’re not wrong—but this belief causes you to always be on guard. Nobody challenges you easily, and if someone dares to, you fight back even harder, enforcing your self-confidence and self-assertive attitude. People see Enneagram 8s as dominating and unbreakable, and this image that is projected also reinforces your own beliefs. It’s easy for you to go around with your heart bursting with pride. As a Type 8 you think your value relies on always being in control. Otherwise, you feel helpless and scared to death of being hurt.
90%
very high
INDEPENDENT:
You’ll do whatever it takes to set your way
30%
very high
RELAXED
You need to be in control, so you can’t relax
65%
very high
CONFIDENCE:
You love empowering others
How do you love?
Love can be another fighting zone for 8s. Restless, you keep demanding what you want from your lover. You feel good while dominating the relationship and often try to fit or mold others to meet your expectations. This can cause some tension or hurt the bond. However, there is a natural fighting instinct in you. If there are no tension and challenges to the relationship, you’ll soon get bored of it.
Anyone can assume that once you are in a safe place, like that within an intimate bond, you can lower your guard, but no. With Eights, just the opposite occurs. The more vulnerable you feel, the more aggressive you can get. So, it’s common to be competitive in love. If you open your heart, your lover must know the enormity of this reality and it must be met with highs at the same degree of delivery.
Enneagram Wings
Enneagram 8 Wing 7:
The Independent
This kind flows through life with agility and calmness. You are self-confident so you always find a way to make your dreams come true. You really don’t skimp on that. You are truly inspiring as you challenge others to test their skills and undertake new projects, but you can be very conflicted when you run into dominant imposing attitudes.
Enneagram 8 Wing 9:
The Bear
The Bears care a lot about protecting people and creating bonds with full awareness of their surroundings. You are realistic and tough when you need to be. You face life and challenges with your head up, backed up by the perfect blend of power and calm determination. This constant state of alertness can be exhausting, so you have to learn to trust and flow with the cycles.
The Average Eight
In an average state, Enneagram Type 8s are as self-assertive as always although sometimes you can feel stripped off of resources and silently succumb to fear. To make up for that, as an Eight you have to strengthen your methods and expand yourself. You want to feel in control of any situation, and so often become combative and hostile, just waiting for the moment to show other people you are in charge or have the advantage. The powerful energy of the 8s makes your average a bit extreme. So, imagine the strength that you carry in your hands. But, as Uncle Ben once said, “With great power comes great responsibility.”
The Healthy Eight
When healthy, Enneagram Type 8s don’t need to demonstrate they are always in charge of everything. You open-heartedly know that trusting other people (following your instincts) can be fruitful. Now your power rises from the base of true confidence and peace with the world. It’s not necessary to be on guard, understanding that it’s exhausting. As an Eight, you know that being ok with yourself you are never alone. Self-assertive and ingenious, you make things happen. People get inspired by the Challenger and its strong presence. Strategic and determined, there is nothing that resists your will. Unstoppable, your natural leadership skyrockets without conflicts with the environment and other people because it comes from a safe place and is constructive. Self-reliant, as a Type 8 you know you can do anything and you know it from your soul, not your ego.
The Unhealthy Eight
The constant feeling of danger makes Type 8s paranoid and aggressive. You protect yourself by being a step ahead and displaying your power before someone has a chance of even considering hurting you. Pain and fear are difficult to face since they make Eights feel so weak that you give in to self-destructive attitudes without considering the limits or danger. Isolated behind your power mask, your main fear comes true: the world turns into a wilder place full of threats and you are alone. This increases your hate, driving you to be vengeful and delaying your pace in anger.
Tips to Help You Grow:
We have all seen a stray dog that barks at anyone and tries to bite whoever tries to feed them. “Poor doggie!” we say, and move on. The same thing happens with 8s in an unhealthy state. I know, you don’t want to hurt people; it’s an instinct! But when your animal side takes over, just take a few minutes—or the time you need—to breathe and identify what awakened the beast in you. Which boundary have you trespassed? Have you let other people know about that boundary—even if it’s obvious to you? What do you need to calm down: a hug, a word, silence? If someone offers that, lower your guard and accept it gratefully.
Friendly reminder: when people are scared of you, it’s not power, it’s fearful respect. If you put up a sign saying, “Bad Dog…Do Not Trespass”, people won’t approach you. However, this sign comes with a price: solitude. We need to create bonds, a network of people that support each other, sometimes that involves showing our vulnerability, which may make you look more like a gazelle than a lion. Strength—a real strength—comes from the power that grows when we are true to ourselves.
Your Main Challenges: How to address them?
OVER-CONTROLLING
Let people act and things flow. This will give them social skills and trustworthy evidence-based data to feel resourceful later in the most important situations.
DISTRUSTING
Cultivate honest and deep bonds with loyal people. Try to learn with them to lower your guard without abandoning yourself. Go step by step, building your safe space.
CLOSE-HEARTED
Remember nobody and nothing can damage your essence. It cannot be damaged. Forgive yourself and open your heart again.
How To Be The Best Version Of The yourself?
But, I truly know what’s best for everyone. Why should I not tell people how to do things?
I know. You have the gift of being strategic and ambitious. As a result, you know the perfect way to do things and you see the potential in any situation. But, there’s a problem. At times you self-proclaim yourself as “boss” when nobody is asking for it. This brings you conflict and unleashes your defense mechanisms. Suddenly, you are like a doll abandoned on the roof, all beaten up but still smiling—in other words, you feel as if you have been mistreated and left alone in isolation, yet put on a brave face and pretend all is well. Let me encourage you: find your path to legitimacy. You know you have leader material. You’re not shy to show it off, but that doesn’t mean anything to other people just because you say so. You need to take your time to build trustworthy bonds and learn how to communicate with assertiveness and positivity. People need to know you are competent and consistent. Choose when it is important to lead and when it is convenient to let go of control.
Why should I lower my guard?
As you are self-reliant, there’s no need to be on guard all the time. You understand that usually people don’t attack others; they just reflect their own inner wars. You choose if it’s necessary to react. It’s easy to confuse reaction with control to make others respect you. Contrary to what you think, when you react you’re playing the game by someone else’s rules. When you’re able to see that everyone is in charge of their own attitude, you will see how others are fighting alone in the ring. That’s how absurd you look sometimes, too. Being independent requires choosing your battles. If the outside can’t hurt you, there is no need to defend yourself. We only see threats when we feel stripped of resources.
If the outside can’t hurt you, there is no need to defend yourself. We only see threats, when we feel stripped off resources.
I don’t want people to see me as vulnerable. Is there another way to do this?
Hide. Go to an island or even go crazy; otherwise, it’s impossible. You’ve learned for good that you need to be self-protective. It was a painful process, but you have passed through it really well. You know how to go out and about with an indestructible look. Nobody wants to mess with you. On the other hand, sometimes you beg—silently, of course—for deeper relationships. Then you remember that it’s best if you move alone at your own pace and it goes away. But, hey, being vulnerable is not being weak. Paradoxically, in vulnerabilities we find the tools that strength uses to defend ourselves. Vulnerability is the answer to avoid feeling helpless. Update your mindset with all the things you avoid: your past, the world. Accept them. Facing these things will help you conquer your life and make your self-assertiveness flourish from the foundation of your unbreakable power. I’m going to paraphrase Tyrion from GOT: “Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.”
I was born to be someone important. Should that be my goal?
Of course, my friend. You’ve got it all. I’m pretty sure you are going to achieve whatever you desire. But there is just one thing that gets in the way: you. Bend the knee for you. Stop fearing and rely on yourself. You can protect yourself. You’re safe, it’s ok. Now, without your own inner war projecting everywhere, you are able to take action on the matter that summons you at the present. Oh, I almost forgot: you were born important. Always remember that because it’s the raw material for your next huge creation.
Compatibility with Other Types
Find out how is your relationship with others Enneagram Types:
