Enneagram Type 6 in A Relationship with Type 7
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship?
Enneagram type Sixes and Enneagram type Sevens are both mental types; therefore, there is usually a great deal of mental stimulation in this couple. In a romantic pair, both these types bring positive qualities to each other which may help reinforce and counterbalance each other’s limitations. They are both mentally quick people who enjoy joking around with each other, laughing and pushing each other to more outrageous limits.
Sevens are high-spirited and joyful people who tend to cheer Sixes’ lives up. They constantly think of new ideas and help Sixes putting their fears and limitations into perspective in order to move beyond them entirely. While Sixes are masters at practicing every single step needed to get things done. This can be quite an effective team in which chores are equally divided: Sevens layout the big picture and keep people excited about the plan, while Sixes bring the logistic, tactical know-how and details. As a romantic pair, the same balance applies: Sixes are the regulators while Sevens are the stimulators.
Sixes bring commitment, loyalty, expertise, grounding and reality to this functional pair, and Sevens fully trust and rely on them. On their side, Sevens bring a driving sense of optimism and happiness, new possibilities and adventure, high energy and no fear making mistakes. They can also teach Sixes to be resilient and enjoy the idea of a future.
Potential Conflicts and Disagreements
In a couple of unhealthy Sixes and Sevens, the picture painted above can quickly shift. On one hand, Sixes are interested in stability and security, and also quickly identifying possible problems. As they are pessimistic and negative people, they spend a lot of energy trying to prevent future disasters.
On the other hand, Sevens seek happiness and being free from frustrations and anxiety. They enjoy trying new things and looking for new opportunities to overcome their own limitations. They are also not interested at all in problems or obstacles since they are positive and optimistic people. In short, Sixes look for someone to share a long-term commitment while Sevens are scared of them.
Sixes may feel that Sevens are too selfish, immature and unreliable. And constantly wonder if they can be trusted or not: “Will they go with someone else or avoid responsibilities in a difficult situation? Sevens may feel that Sixes are too anxious, uneasy, and concerned about everything around them even before trying. They feel that Sixes live under limits and rules that Sevens feel as largely imposed restrictions.
In this couple, their opposing philosophies reflect the different expectations they have in life and in a love relationship. Unless those differences are reconciled, this couple will hardly stay together.