Enneagram type 2 in a relationship with type 6
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship?
Enneagram type Twos (Helpers) and Enneagram type Sixes (Loyalists) are constant, loyal to each other and they take the relationship very seriously. Both of them are responsible and committed to each other. That is the reason why they tend to put the needs of their significant other before their own. They are also socially involved in their community as they know the importance of social connections; mainly because it gives them a sense of belonging and a certain value to their world.
On one hand, Sixes really appreciate Twos’ generosity, kindness, warmth and compassion. Sixes are aware of their family orientation and know that Twos are potentially good spouses and parents. They also know that Twos can be trusted as they see how loyal Twos are. On the other hand, Twos admire how hard- working, committed, perseverant and modest Sixes are. These are some of the reasons why Twos feel that they can count on Sixes’ surveillance to spot difficulties and trust them. Although sometimes Sixes can be bad-tempered and indecisive, Twos realize that Sixes almost always come around in the end. If they achieve a healthy relationship, they may actually admire each other and their relationship will be based on steadiness, mutual respect, and warmth.
Potential Conflicts and Disagreements
Although this couple has the potential to have an enduring and productive life together, there might be some issues between them. One of the main potential trouble spots between Twos and Sixes has to do with the dichotomy of control and independence between being too close or being too far apart. This problem mainly falls on unconfident Sixes and their indecision. An average Six tend to feel pressured by all kinds of demands made by their partner, their boss, their friends, and even their relatives.
Feeling pressured makes Sixes feel anxious and trapped. They might even feel unstable and unable to make clear decisions. In order to defend themselves, Sixes might get reactive and impulsively take almost any action just to relieve their anxieties. At those times, Twos may try to help and advise their elusive partner in order to empower them and help them through their anxiety. However, no matter how well-intentioned Twos may be, Sixes will perceive their help as intrusive and may feel some resentment.
The problem is that an unhealthy Two will probably consider that there is no such a thing as “too much intimacy” since they are truly affectionate lovers. On the other side, Sixes can be a little contradictory: they may push their partners away and then pull them closer. This inconsistency drives their partner crazy while fostering a fear of rejection. Twos will tear themselves apart trying to get closer to their partners, while Sixes will desperately look for some distance. This couple can get involved in an endless drama that can be fatal to their relationship and possibly lead them to dispair.